The chilli system
Every offering carries a number of chillies. They show what the intensity may be for your nervous system, so you know beforehand what you are stepping into.
I use the chilli system to show how deep an exercise can reach. It says something about intensity, about how much is asked of you, and about how far the meeting with another person goes.
Sexuality and tantra touch our deepest layers. That is why I work trauma-informed. I acknowledge that everyone carries a backpack and that an exercise can open doors you did not expect.
Trauma-informed with me also means radical responsibility. I offer the holding and the safe container, and you are the captain of your own ship. I expect my guests and participants to be able to carry themselves, to feel and communicate their own limits, and to take responsibility for their own process.
Level 0: The stillness
Clothes stay on. The focus lies entirely on your own inner world, on the meeting with yourself. Safe, holding, and meant to bring your nervous system to rest. Think of Yoga Nidra.
🌶️ Level 1: The connection
Clothes stay on, and we reach out. A soft touch, eye contact. We explore the space between me and you. Subtle, and felt.
🌶️🌶️ Level 2: The opening
Sensuality is given room. Clothes can come off, always your choice. We work with the flow of desire and intimacy. You are invited to drop out of your head and into your body.
🌶️🌶️🌶️ Level 3: The surrender
Nude is welcome here when it feels right. Clear attunement, first of all with yourself, is always central. We work directly with raw life force. This asks for a high level of self-awareness and the ability to breathe through your own resistance inside a safe holding.
Where my offerings sit
- 🌶️ Free introduction. Level 1. Clothes stay on, we explore the first touch of rope.
- 🌶️ Classes L1, L2 and L3. Level 1. Learning technique, clothes stay on.
- 🌶️ Rope jam. Level 1. Practising together, clothes stay on.
- 🌶️🌶️ Shibari meets Tantra. Level 2. Sensuality is given room and clothes can come off, always your choice.
- 🌶️🌶️🌶️ Bind mij los. Level 3. A weekend in which we work directly with raw life force.
For a private session we set the level together, beforehand and during.
What this asks of you
The higher the level, the more self-awareness I ask of you. At level 1 you only have to show up. At level 3 I ask that you recognise your own resistance and can breathe through it, inside the holding I offer.
You can always step down. If halfway through you feel an exercise is too much, you step out without having to explain. That is exactly what the system exists for.
Read also how I work with safety and consent.
Frequently asked questions
Because it is clear at a glance. At every event you see how intense it can be and you choose what fits you right now.
That I know an exercise can open doors you did not see coming, and that I build the space so that this is allowed to happen. I offer the holding. You remain the captain of your own ship.
No. Most people start at level 1 and grow into it. There is no reason at all to rush.
Yes. You decide how far you go along in an exercise, and you can always take a step back without explaining.
Nude is welcome when it feels right. It is an invitation, and attunement with yourself comes first.